Human soul is a cloud of confusion and contradictions. There is no straight-cut formula, approach or ideology that will help us decipher it. The randomness of the human soul and consciousness is the biggest challenge to the human civilization.
Art, literature and entrepreneurship over the years have thrown immense light on the strange workings of the human soul and consciousness. What can you conclude having read the Anna Karenina or the countless theological and literary interpretations of the Feast of Sacrifice (Binding of Isaac or Binding of Ishmael) or the enigmatic questions of life and death in the Upanishads or Meursault’s journey in the Outsider or Amal’s fall into the silence of death in the Dakghar or having traveled through the majestic trappings of the Walt Disney’s empire? We can simply conclude: It is nearly impossible to conclude.
There is a rational engine embedded in our soul and consciousness that helps us to understand the universe and our existence, and take decisions for ourselves in order to survive according to our aspirations and circumstances. At the same time, there rests an amorphous wave in the unseen quarters of our soul and consciousness that makes us realize that in each phenomenon that we encounter or know of, there are other traits that travel through the discovered laws, repetitions and patterns like transversals of sudden lightning, which are not easily subject to reasoned analysis.
Recently I sensed a conflict in my own soul: While in real life I am not given to mysticism or spirituality (in fact, I shun them and in public forums argue against them being aware of the havoc such things create on gullible people), there lies a deep longing within to surrender and submit to an ‘enlightened soul’. If taken forward, this could extend to the point of giving up my Self to this ‘enlightened soul’ (could be a theological or political or corporate ideologue); this would as a corollary relieve me of the critical stresses that modern life generates because of its omnipotent commercialization and hyper-consumption and end up reducing me to a vegetable where I am no longer required to take any decisions about myself but follow a path that is laid out for me.
In a way, the conflicting strains are between the rigors of decisive action and the longing to be a renunciate.
The challenge is: How to stay away from dogma in participating in both the experiences – the path of natural science and the tunnel of metaphysics; it is also important to know that a complete path is one that can contain both the experiences.
Somebody who does not know me well asked me a few days back: What do I read when I am despairing? Actually, nothing came to my mind, so I ended up saying: Well, sometimes I read the Psalm 23. The questioner practically frowned at me; he said: And, your friends say that you are an atheist!
I kept quiet not knowing what to reply.
The Psalm 23 is given below; you may read it if you wish to.
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death; I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me All the days of my life; And I will dwell in the house of the Lord Forever.
